


after we fall

by A_Likely_Story



Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, car journeys, showering, sleeping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-22
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:20:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25952812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Likely_Story/pseuds/A_Likely_Story
Summary: Set in the car journey after they escape Merrick's labsThe car is silent. Andy drives slowly, weaving in and out of the heavy London traffic, her expression one of fierce concentration.Joe is in the passenger seat beside her, body held taut with the violent strings of anger. Booker, behind him, has crumpled himself low into the seat, as if by taking up the least space as he possibly can, they might forget that he is there.
Relationships: Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Comments: 11
Kudos: 204





	after we fall

The car is silent. Andy is drives slowly, weaving in and out of the heavy London traffic, her expression one of fierce concentration.  
Joe is in the passenger seat beside her, body held taut with the violent strings of anger. Booker, behind him, has crumpled himself low into the seat, as if by taking up the least space as he possibly can, they might forget that he is there.  
Nicky sits beside Booker, but he has left a gap, a small gap that speaks volumes because he would never normally hold his body purposefully away from his family. Nicky has his legs splayed forward, one hand grasping Joe's in the front seat.  
Nile sleeps, her consciousness fading almost as soon as she had buckled her belt, adrenaline changing swiftly to a deep, immoveable slumber.  
Andy catches Nicky's eye in the mirror.  
“There's a safe house in the countryside. Forty minutes away. “  
Nicky nods.  
Andy looks wrecked. Wrecked in the way that only mortals can look. Nicky looks at her then looks away. There is too much that has happened too fast. He needs time to unpack it all.  
Joe turns and looks at Nicky, avoiding looking at Booker, who has curled further into himself and is staring resolutely out of the window.  
Joe traces a finger over Nicky's lips, and Nicky leans in slightly to the touch. He could almost fall asleep like this, tethered to Joe, moving in limbo.  
But he does not. He is sandwiched between a betrayal and a new guard. His leader has began the countdown to death. His lover has sharp thorns of anger radiating off him even as he holds him in his arms.  
So Nicky does not sleep. He watches the sun begin to set, the sky slowly bleeding into a dull red. He watches Andy, tired and pained, struggling to concentrate on the road. He watches Joe clench and unclench his fists, imagining Booker on the receiving end of them.  
He glances at Booker, who gives him a wary, guilty look, a trapped animal, who let them become the trapped animals. He turns away from Booker and looks to Nile, deeply asleep, the strain of the day causing her body to repair itself through the healing power of sleep.

He watches and he waits. He has become very good at waiting. 

.....  
Andy makes it to the safe house in thirty minutes. She stops at an old house, too big for her liking. Nicky pulls out a pistol and hands it to Joe. Booker steps out of the car, and Nicky shakes Nile gently awake.  
Joe and Nicky do a sweep of the place, because this is a safe house organised by Copley and he hasn’t yet earned their trust. Andy needs to keep Joe and Booker separate while everyone cleans up. The car smells of blood and sweat and sorrow, and Andy is glad to leave it.  
Booker enters the house after Joe and Nicky declare it safe, and disappears into a room. Andy hopes he will have the sense to stay in there. They are all tired and wearied by the weeks events.  
Andy and the others convene in the rather shabby living room. Nile is looking from one to the other, not sure what is acceptable post mission protocol. Joe and Nicky are standing beside each other, barely touching. Andy is struck by how young they both look, unexpected grief and pain stripping years from their faces.  
“Copley said there's two bathrooms.” Andy informs them. “One on the top floor,” she jerks her head toward Joe and Nicky. “And one on the next floor up.” She nods at Nile.  
“Andy,” says Nicky, and then closes his mouth. He gestures at her. “Your wounds.” His hands fall limply to his sides, and Joe picks one of them up. Squeezes it. Holds it.  
Andy watches their hand holding with a detached interest. They have never much had to worry about their wounds before, given that they didn’t last very long. She looks down at herself. These wounds she will feel for some time.  
“I'm probably most up to date in the wonders of modern medicine,” Nile says, and Andy tries to not see the tiny flinch that Joe and Nicky react with. Modern medicine has taken parts of their organs.  
“Unless any of you have a medical degree you wanna tell me about? “ Nile arches an eyebrow and Joe huffs out a laugh. Andy is suddenly so grateful for Joe, for his ability to be burning hot with anger but to still see the humour in what is there in front of him.  
“’Fraid not,” Joe says. Nicky sags a little against him, closing his eyes. Andy isn’t sure if it is from exhaustion or the results of whatever Merrick Labs had done to them both.  
“Go get cleaned up, “ Andy tells them firmly, because otherwise they will hover, and Nicky will look worried until he passes out or Joe forces him to leave.  
Joe snakes a hand around Nicky’s hip, and together they leave the room, making the slow journey up to the top up the house.

...  
It feels like an age since Joe and Nicky have been properly alone. Joe is impressed that they are still awake, but then he supposes that technically they did both have plenty of power naps throughout the day.  
It is tempting to just fall into bed. It is a big bed, with feather soft covers and thin pillows. Nicky sits down heavily at the side of it. It doesn’t really matter. The blood has all dried.  
“Shower, then bed?” Joe coaxes, and Nicky opens his eyes and smiles at him lazily. He stands up and approaches Joe, then kisses him. It is tender, and fierce and holds the fear and worry of the past few days.  
Joe knows from experience that it will take a while for Nicky to talk about it, if he will talk about it at all. He will listen to whatever Joe may have to say upon the subject, and respond to his words, but he will not necessarily interject with his own feelings. In a while, maybe six months from now, they will be washing up and Nicky will make a comment that refers back to it . It will not happen straight away though, and Joe understands.  
They all have their way of dealing.

Joe turns on the shower and Nicky strips out of his clothes, helping Joe with his own. They are both flagging now. Really they need food, but Joe knows that if they eat before they sleep they will feel ill when they reawaken.  
The steam from the shower makes them both drowsy, and they lean against each other, heads touching. The water going down the plughole is red with blood, but Joe doesn’t look at it. He looks at Nicky, beautiful Nicky, who is not looking at him.  
“Nicoló,” Joe strokes Nicky's cheeks, and Nicky tilts his head up, looking at Joe with those brilliant eyes.  
“Yusuf,” Nicky's voice is thick with emotion.  
They stand like that for several moments, foreheads together, grounded by the others touch. Then Joe realises the water is running cold, and returns to the task of removing blood and brain matter from Nicky's hair.  
Nicky is still, pliant even, as Joe scrubs at his head as gently as he can. Joe can still feel the helpless desperation that sliced through his entire body after Keane shot Nicky.  
His hand shakes. How could Booker-  
Nicky uncurls Joe's fists. Soaps him down. The water runs cold now, but they are clean and whole and together.  
They fall into bed and they sleep the greedy sleep of the exhausted, Nicky slotted into place against Joe's torso, Joe's arm slung over Nicky’s shoulder, hands laced together.  
As they should be.

**Author's Note:**

> So having rewatched the film for the nth time, I realised I somehow got the seating arrangement slightly wrong?? Please accept my sincere apologies haha anyway I love my found family


End file.
